Apparently I have a new/different blog! Indeed.
I also have a partial explanation for my absence over the last many months. I’m kind of tired. Since finishing college and getting one of those full-time job things (completely unrelated to anything I studied, of course) it’s been difficult to find the time or willpower to immerse myself in terrible facts and awfulness and then write about it. Which isn’t to say I’m done with blogging – of course not. (And I have been writing, just not here, and not necessarily online.) But just to give you an idea of where I’ve been at lately, well, that’s where I’ve been lately.
I’ve thought a lot about writing this post. If I tell everyone that this is how I’ve been feeling, if/when I go back to regularly writing posts, I’ll have this blip in my history in which I let everyone know that I sort of felt “done” with it all. I’ve thought a lot about how I’d tell you all how I’ve thought a lot about this. Right now I’m thinking about how stupidly dramatic this sounds.
The things I would want to write about, things happening in my life…. I can’t entirely. I still want to retain my mostly-anonymous status. Of course, some of my anonymity was gladly given up to meet so many of you at the Radfem Reboot conference last summer and since then. Still, I feel like I can’t talk about my job, which is a huge part of my life. (And oh the material there! It’s a shame.) It also is a bit of an odd thing knowing the literal faces of my audience (hey there, you).
Another aspect to my silence is that I simply don’t feel like I have the energy to do anything “new” and if I’m just repeating what’s already been done to death, what’s the point? And, hey, maybe I don’t have anything great to add in this current venue anyway. Yeah, yeah, women and imposter syndrome. It’s a terrible case I have.
But here I am. Saying things at you all. And not just making funny funny jokes in a separate corner of the internet.
So here’s to actually maybe using this new blog and to ending my marathon of self-care indulgence. Maybe.